Hey there! Long time no see! I cannot even believe how busy things have been these last few months. Beyond. Just beyond. One of my (many) New Year’s resolutions was to blog weekly….we’ll see how that goes 😉
2013 in review:
Some highlights, for which I really have to praise Jesus, who has blessed me beyond measure:
I had a baby!!!! Yay for not being pregnant anymore, and double yay for a cutie pie to hold in my arms!! And triple yay for my mom coming to help…cuz I was a little bit overwhelmed (or a lot) at first. These things pretty much trump all other awesome things from last year. But, we had a couple of good trips: we went to San Diego for our “Babymoon,” we had interviews out West and subsequently have jobs there! A blessing in disguise: needing a doggy behavioralist for our little girl dog, whose nose was severely out of joint after Baby G was born and she was no longer Princess). Santa brought me a brand new DSLR camera for Christmas, and I am going to take some online photography classes with hubby. I just really want to capture each and every sweet moment with Baby G, and I can’t wait to do it! We’re gonna shoot for one class/week; it’s at our own pace. So, be on the lookout for much better pictures!
Some bummers:
I had a tough bout of baby blues, and then followed by a tough case of mommy guilt. This was so terribly terribly hard for me to deal with, because I felt like I really had no right to feel sad or guilty, with a beautiful, healthy baby in my arms, a reasonably uncomplicated birth, and my loving husband and super helpful mother there to help me out. I was just sooo sooooo hard on myself for not instantly being the perfect mother. Additionally, I really let my in-laws put a damper on Baby G’s birth (and most of last year, for that matter). Prayers please. Additionally, when we went back down South Christmas, it was less a celebration and more a cleaning out of the aging/passed grandparent’s belongings/houses. In and of itself, this wouldn’t have been so hard, I don’t think, except that the last time we had been home was for G’ma and G’pa’s funerals…and my uncle’s funeral before that. I realized that I hadn’t made nearly as many happy memories at home in GA as I had sad ones in the last 3-5 years. It took a bigger toll on me than I realized, and it was a tough end to a tough year.
After assessing the year, I almost always have New Year’s resolutions, and mine this year are as follows:
1. Let go of the past, look to the future. We have had more than our share of interesting/awful extended family moments this year, but I think we are finally coming to terms with some of the unfortunate things that happened. Thank goodness, too- our marriage is better than ever. It’s much easier to live a normal life without someone criticizing your every move and decision behind your back, for both of us. Which brings me to my next resolution:
2. Stop trying to please everyone. If I hadn’t been so intent on needing to please everyone (which isn’t possible anyhow), I could’ve done what needed to be done a loooooong time ago- let those people go. So my first two resolutions are intimately connected to each other. I need to respect that people may have the right to their own opinions (of me), even if I don’t agree with them. I don’t need to fit into their ideals, either. I just need to do what’s best for my family and myself.
3. Stop feeling guilty about taking some “me” time. Sometimes I need some “me” time, just to keep my feeling like myself- but I have got to stop feeling guilty for it. I would tell any other new mom the same thing, so I need to listen to my own advice. No more mommy guilt.
4. Learn to accept myself as-is. I am blessed beyond measure, after all. God has found favor in me and my life, and I don’t need to be perfect to accept and be thankful for his blessings!
That’s about it! We are thankful for all that we learned in 2013, and ready for a brighter future in 2014! In a few short months, we will be done with our residencies, house shopping, moving out West, and starting our first real careers, so stay tuned! This will be a great year, I can just feel it! Happy New Year! 🙂
So happy for your update!!! I can't imagine how you found the time. I asked your mom if she thought you would still blog, and she said "no way!" She said you were just too busy. Your blogging is like a baby journal plus so much more, it will be worth it in the end if you're able to do it. If not, that's okay too!!
I'm sorry to hear about the toxic relationships, I've been there done that, and still doing it!! I can't imagine not loving you as a daughter-in-law!!! Hold your ground, you are doing the right thing. If they want a relationship, they will come around. You hold all the cards! It's amazing to me that in-laws (and parents!) do not understand this. You have their son's heart,and Graysons! They are the ones that stand to lose everything.
I hope we can all make good memories from here on out. I'm sure Jamie's funeral and Ted's wasn't the most pleasant either. More unhappy times in Georgia! It is actually a very nice place to live when bad things are not occurring, lol.
I wish your family many blessings this year!! Here's to family gatherings with no sadness or drama!!
Love,
Aunt Janet
Awww, thanks Aunt Janet!! I miss blogging so much, it's so good for me! I bet it'll be wonderful to have for my baby journal someday 🙂
Thanks for the sweet words of support and wisdom! Sometimes, it feels like we are doing the opposite of the right thing by holding our ground, but it really really has been so good for our own relationship to back away from other toxic ones and grow together towards more healthy ones, so I think it's the right thing, too.
Funerals are tough, too, for sure, but I think I would definitely have regretted not going to them more! It's funny, cuz Georgia still is my home, and I still have this amazing draw to be there, even though it's been years and years. I'm sooo looking forward to making good memories
We were wondering when we would get to see more pics of Grayson! He is adorable! You are right — your family is your priority. Don't let toxic people pull you down to your level. Look at all you have accomplished in the past eight years. You have a right to be proud of yourself. Watch for some sourdough bread — Carl is on a baking spree! Also, check out Callie's new product: harmonyblendsalts.com Vicki
Hey VIcki!! Glad to hear Carl is baking!! I can't wait to see Callie's website, looks like it's under construction right now 🙂